During a couple of catch up sesion with friends, I was asked the same question over and over again. "What did you do at Langkawi that you had to sleep so late and skip meals?"
I can go on and on to tell them about the car I rode, the hotel I stayed at, how hot Langkawi was, how cheap the chocolates were but I just can't seem to recall anything about what I did and what happened in the media centre. What state of mind I was at?
I know that the event is over and there's no point recollecting it but the fact that fragments are missing is really bothering me. There are days where I really want to go to bed early but I ended up sleeping really late because I was trying to think of the unthinkable.
I swear that I was never a victim of my own mind! Even when I was taught philosophy on existence, I don't over think it. Why am I so vulnerable this time?
A couple of years ago, I always dream of this primary school friend. It was really disturbing because we were not close friends, never kept in touch, does not even know dead or alive. Do I owe him money or something?
One morning, I woke up and told myself, stop psychoanalyzing yourself. Whatever it is, it doesn't matter anymore. You can think about it a million times, and still won't be able to come up with an answer. And after that, no more old friend dreams!
Hopefully, tomorrow when I wake up I'll be able to get over the gaps and worry about some other things like my post grad application!
Till then, I'm just gonna crush whatever that comes in my way.
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| Who wanna go swing some bat and hit some balls? |
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